It's approaching very quickly, less than 4 weeks!

I am all done with my finals now, and probably should be relieved, but I think most of my stress has been stemming from things other than school, so I'm still feeling kind of tense. Additionally, the weather has been REALLY cruddy lately. It's hard to feel antsy for summer when it's 45 and raining.

Since I last wrote, I found out I received a $1,000 scholarship to go toward my tuition for the study abroad program-- Such a blessing! In the same way it's been great to receive prayers, support, and affirmation I have received from people around me about Young Life and Peace House, it is also reassuring to have my academic goals affirmed.

Months ago, during the application and early planning process, I spent so much time writing about my experiences to this point and my hopes for Tanzania: Support letters, application essays, scholarship essays... Lately though, most of my concern about Tanzania has been placed in more logistical concerns: pouring over emails, getting vaccinations, booking flights, attaining my visa, picking up prescriptions, thinking about packing... And of course, all the daily distractions of "real life": papers, tests, work, plans, friends, housing...

Last night, after realizing how burnt out I was feeling from all this planning and final paper writing, I pulled up of those things I wrote about Tanzania months ago and read them again. I think I am going to print them and take them with me on my trip, it's so necessary for me to remember how excited about this I am. I mean, I am still excited, but I want to remember specifically why I chose this, why it is important, and how many people are supporting me through it.

I will be real about my concerns right now:
I am really worried about being lonely and/or homesick. I'm a little sad to be missing this summer here at KPA in Minneapolis, and a little sad to be missing the summer at home with my family and friends there.
I am worried because I know God is going to do work in my life, and I know ultimately it will be good, but some of the work He has done in the past year, in addition to being necessary and wonderful has been frustrating and painful.
I am hoping that through the experience, God will give me some direction for what comes next. I'm a little concerned that He wont, and I'm a little concerned about what it will be if He does...

Basically, I think I'm right where I should be: filled with anticipation, ready for a few weeks to relax at home first, kind of nervous, nearing completion of my check-list, and spending a lot of time at God's mercy.

Hope you all are well.